Exploring Depth in Textile Art through Color and Texture

A few years ago, when we first bought this home, I began working with appliqué, using my own hand printed cloth. At the time, I was working small, because we were having construction done, and the table that was available to me was limited in size. I had been using the techniques reviewed in Playful Fabric Printing to create a new color triangle. The triangle we use in PFP has 28 colors in a gradation of 4 values, for a total of 112 colors in all. The cloth I had printed, up till that point, began to pile up. And I had to ask myself, what I was printing all that cloth for. I do understand the incongruence of working small and using up gads of cloth!

Anyway. The primary MX colors I have used for this triangle, are Strong Orange 202, MX Grape 801 and MX Deep Navy 414. These choices, as you might imagine, are skewed away from the traditional red, yellow and blue you might expect of a color wheel. In my current grouping, Strong Orange stands in place of yellow. MX Grape stands in place of red, and Navy, an earthy, heavier blue, anchors itself within this triangle in the blue position. 

I am now, more than half way, from completing the stated mission. Each time I mix three new colors within this triangle, I print single color prints. I have a fair amount of single color prints at this point too. I have blown out most of the screens in my collection and I have created a few new single color prints ready to be burned. 

(Honestly, I cannot wait to print. Printing is, by far, the most favorite thing I do. I love creating repeats. I like printing yards at a time. And, to be fair, steaming and boiling isn’t my favorite part of ‘doing the thing’, but who cares, there are yards of new cloth at the end of doing it. My own! Hand-printed cloth!) 

As I created the repeat for each of these single color prints, I took into account, how much white you might be able to see. White can really POP into the visual space, as you see in the circle print, found mostly in the sky of the above the unfinished, Fox and Bird artwork. When I first started using my fabrics together, I wondered if there was too much texture, too much white. I questioned if the patterns vied with one another in an unsettling, or mishmash way. I don’t know. I guess, I don’t care. I have so many single color prints in my possession and I need to make something out of them! I try to use the POPs of white to my advantage within the motifs and placement within the patchwork. And I like to vary the amount of white that comes forward in my textile designing. Small medium and large. 🙂

When I walk, I like gazing into the canopy, whether leaves in summertime or bare branch in winter, I like to experience the sun dappling and its warmth touching every bit it can. In looking through the trees, seeing the light, there is so much depth and camouflage about it. There is no one thing, leave, branch or trunk, that stands alone. 

That is what I see or feel, when I use all of these single color patterns, together. That interaction of light, color and value and depth.

The narrative within this Fox and Bird piece has not come to fruition. Now that it is basted, I will let it sit and ask it what it wants. I still think the bird needs something MORE, something dark? Grr. There is a part of me that wants to see a diamond between the Fox and Bird. I have definitely been influenced by the apple in this piece. Here is a pile of the Bird rejects so far.

In the meantime, my little cat LuLu started to think this piece was her table blanket. She bullied me, one day, as I was trying to get the basting done. I did not want her sitting on the piece. And, the Lu just wanted to sit on my thing, it was her thing. It was usually covered with tracing paper and Lu likes tracing paper too. I have finally gotten everything basted, so this is no longer a temptation. The piece can now stay on my design wall and LuLu can have the table back. Phew.

Using my Voice

I have been a journey of self love and acceptance, as I hope we all are. Some days, I would call it radical acceptance.

As I mentioned previously, my Mom recently passed away. My Father passed a few years back and my sibling is no contact. I understand why my sibling went no contact and I am proud of them for it, even if it pains me. So, a very important aspect of my life has come to a close.
In going through my childhood photos, I see my teen Mother. I see my addicted, biker-gang Father. I see the dysfunction I was raised in. I see my childhood best friend, whose Mother was murdered by her own Father in the two family home I grew up in. It is more real to me now.

I have been fearful of this moment for a long while. I knew what I would see and was hesitant to allow myself to feel the grief of honest assessment.

But. I have done good work on myself. I am able to hold the grief that my childhood was not what I needed, or wanted. I am able to hold the grief that my Mother deserved better, and was unable to attain that for herself. I am able to see my broken Father and understand the impact of his unhealed trauma.

For lack of emotional safety, I have for years, made myself palatable, smaller, less. I have been a people pleaser who overcompensates emotionally, in order to maintain relationship. I have come to understand that this is an avoidant behavior, a protective behavior. This behavior helped me survive.

I love all of these people. We had good times, I cannot deny this. We did our best by one another. Many of the acute negative behavior subsided and allowed a portion of contentment. I will miss my Mother and Father. I wish all the best for my sibling.

And, I am ready to put this part of my life behind me.

My task now, is to continue to discern what is true to me. To question my triggers and slow myself down, so that I may act in accordance with my own best interest.

I choose me. I choose dancewalking. I embrace my childlike curiosity. I invest in my creativity, which is meditation in action. I am no longer afraid to bring all of myself to relationship. I trust that I can handle rupture and work toward repair. I am accountable to myself and others. I no longer fear abandonment when I use my voice. I am a cycle breaker.

This is a sad place, a place of mourning and deep introspection. But, I begin to feel myself turning toward me and I am proud, glad, able. This is a place of great hope and renewed meaning. This feels like a cosmic request for change and I am ready.

It is time to make, More Art.

I have updated my Etsy shop with many small works and invite you to check it out. I would like to remind you where to find me on social media, like Instagram and also, my Facebook Artist and personal accounts. I am grateful to all who choose to come here and read my introspections. I look forward to rebuilding community of my own making. Please don’t hesitate to comment, to make suggestions, or to subscribe to this blog.

Etsy Update!

Hello, my good and burgeoning readership! I am happy to announce an Etsy Shop update. There are Daisy Gazers, Hand Holders, Owls and more!

My current small works are an exploration of story telling with birds, daisies and natural elements, amidst a fiesta of color and texture. All of the fabrics in these works are hand printed by me and the designs are of my own creation. (BUT, there is one caveat. When I create the little people, I use commercial prints for their shirts and clothing! Which somehow made sense, artistically.) It also makes sense, when depicting people among natural elements that their arms might really stretch into the atmosphere, striving for connection.

When I begin creating each piece, a story emerges, birds will weigh down daisy stems, which are quite obliging! Appreciating having something to do and glad that their petals are being admired. When I first began working in this style my pieces were quite small, and over time, I have begun to make bigger and bigger applique motifs.

I truely hope one of these stories tickles your fancy. head over to my Etsy to check them out. You will also find hand printed pocket squares, patches and my Zine. 🌿


I am happy to be back and it is exciting to poke around and see how many folk are stopping by, and to get some comments too. It feels so nice.

Soon, I will show you an applique piece I started where the motifs weren’t nearly as big as I want them. 🤩🥰 Thanks for stopping by.

A Flamingo and a Sand Dollar?

A friend through Facebook reached out and asked if I would make an ornament which depicted both an American Flamingo and a Sand Dollar. I jumped at this request.

When I hear the word, ornament, I think of a dimensional object, hanging from a loop. I upcycled some packing cardboard to create the base. I wrapped the base with a commercial print which extols the virtues of Lavendar.

The inspiration for the ornament

In looking at images of American Flamingo, their legs go on for ages! They make me want to use the word, gams! American Flamingos have great gams! 😂🤩 After that, it just made sense that my flamingo would appear to, almost, stand upon its own head.

Once I got the Flamingo sewn to the base, it only made sense to suspend what appears to be a Sand Dollar. It’s little cubby was asking for something fancy!

Designing a Life (and a Flamingo)

A drawing of the bird along with the fabrics to depict it.
The inspiration for the ornament
The base or structure of the orament

These last few months have been challenging. I first lost my job and income, then I lost my Mom. My father passed away a few years ago and my sibling is no contact. This part of my life is coming to a close and a profound shift is occurring.

I feel as if a reordering is occurring, from all directions. While going through my Mothers belongings, I came across a complete set of report cards for myself. They indicate that I have dyscalculia and Dyslexia, two learning disorders which, in retrospect, I can now see, have affected two of my most recent employment scenarios. I need to find some resources to help support myself in this department. I am unsure as to what to do about this, but it is on my agenda.

In the meantime, I long to teach art technique again. My current deep dive, artistically, is appliqué using my own hand printed cloth. I am wondering if I can run a video class about applique. I would happily create some kits of my fabrics for purchase, though it would not be a necessary purchase, gradations of your own cloth could be used as well.

Above, you will see, I am designing an ornament featuring a pink flamingo, otherwise known as American Flamingo. What I like about these birds are thier spindly legs and knobby knees. Their bulbous beaks aren’t too shabby either. I like falling for a nice bird!

Thanks, Beth, for asking me to make an ornament for you. I hope you will like what I come up with. If anyone would like to commission even the smallest of works, please ask, I am open to the work.
I wonder if it is possible for me to create part time work for myself teaching art technique and selling small works. I have a fair amount of evidence that supports this idea.

I will tell you what though. I am glad I opened up about my experience on Facebook, recently. The post received 100s of comment and really allowed me to feel cared for. It emboldened me to remember that I have salable skills, and can create an employment path that is not traditional.

Emerging after a long silence

It has literally been years since I have utilized this space. The last time I used it, I lived in New York City. It was during Covid 19 lockdown. I was making some really comfortable masks, where all of my supplies were donated by my community. I had a two for one deal, where every mask bought, supplied a mask, to a local essential worker. It was, truly, an amazing endeavor. I felt such grace to replace my income, to help my fellow city dwellers and to interact with my online community.

Since this time, I have moved to the suburbs, found in person work. I have also reorganized my engagement with social media. My use of it has dwindled quite a bit. Where it used to be fun and generative, it is now a place where I hesitate to involve myself. The billionaire owners have revealed their intention to use the space to confuse folks with news that is not worthy, charge for every interaction, and use every post and picture to feed insatiable artificial intelligence.

I have begun to long for the early internet days, where blogs kept us connected, as artists, who wanted community. I do not know if this is possible anymore.who reads blogs? But, here I am, considering the possibility. I have been daydreaming of creating an online appliqué class. I would like to start selling through Etsy again. I long for the connection I was able to create by maintaining a blog. Am I off my rocker?

The above artwork is part of my Unicorn series, which I am calling, The Unicorns are Coming. All fabrics are my hand printed cloth. Back in the day, I went to Facebook and I asked folks, ‘ What do you think of when you think of Unicorns. The responses I got were taken into consideration and I created a collection of fabrics that include motifs like, poppies, soft serve ice cream, apples, bubble gum machines, rainbows, and more. This endeavor changed the trajectory of my creativity and I have been immersed since. I feel even more gratitude! I wonder what might come next.

Batwing Mask w Jersey Knit ear loops and Toggle Bead cinch (FREE PDF Pattern)


Jersey Knit Batwing<——-download this 

I have been kinda bonkers for the GoodNotes app for iPad with pencil!

Here is a FREE PDF #MellyMasks pattern, made using the GoodNotes app. This is a six page, full color pdf pattern with artistic illustrations. The PDF is indexed, has thumbnails and bookmarked pages for easy reference.

Please, if you print this out, let me know if the pattern measures properly! If you have suggestions on other masks you would like a pattern for, leave a comment! I would love to know your thoughts!

Grace, Running Stitch and the ten years between.

I recently listened my Quilters Save Our Stories (QSOS) interview from 2010, where I heard my own voice, an echo of my past, discussing quilt making and hard times. I did this in preparation for a new podcast interview called Running Stitch, also a Quilt Alliance offering, that seeks to highlight and expand upon their rich backlog of quilt history interviews, mine among them. Unrelated to this, I posed for my second Grace portrait by Charise Isis, recently. This convergence of happenings allowed me time to ponder time spent between that November day in 2010 and this August 2020, ten years apart.

In November, ten years ago, I was establishing myself, heck, -I was- established, as an artist, a quilt maker, a surface design artist. I was attending Quilt Market in support of my first book, Inspired to Quilt by Interweave. I was doing well, my artwork was being seen, I was published. I had aspirations of creating a textile line, I felt driven. 

I was also, unknowingly, two months away from a Stage 3 breast cancer diagnosis. 

No breast cancer story is complete without a discussion of reconstruction. Long story short, I chose breastlessness. My chest is a perfect expanse of scarred, but well healed, ‘aesthetic flat closure’, as it is becoming known. 

The growth and the gathering of knowledge, acquired over this decade, has sculpted a more rich, vivid and authentic version, of the Melanie or Melly, I once knew. This new version of Melly has stood naked in front of world class fashion photographers, portrait artists, syndicated news programs and in print magazine articles too. I have used my voice and my flat, breastless, body to make change within the breast cancer community and beyond. 

Supported by my queer, artist identity, I asked myself, ‘what would an artist do, when faced with a dearth of visual representation for their bodily choice’? My response, an artist would harness their power and say ‘the thing’. So, I stepped into that uncharted space and said the thing. 

I have made explicit, by way of participating in photographic projects, that not all people have breasts. I have made explicit that beauty, or ‘female beauty’, is not dependent on breasts, or even the known hourglass shape that is reflected back at us in media depictions. I have also continued to make artwork that includes female bodies with less than two breasts.

In 2011, my reconstructive choice did not have a name. Researching imagery related to choosing ‘no reconstruction’ or ‘mastectomy without reconstruction’ yielded vapid, headless images, which offered lackluster entry into what it might mean to be breastless. I sought to populate this space with with images that convey laughter, love, determination, grit and out loud proud sex appeal. 

Melanie Testa photographed by Esther Hasse for perfektUNperfekt

I challenged myself by saying, ‘Yes’, to walking Rainbow Fashion Week in NYC, I participated in a movie called the Avant Gardener by Lindsay Katt and I traveled to Berlin, Germany to be photographed for PerfecktUNPerfeckt by Uta Melle and Esther Haase. I have reached into my personal depths to reveal my changed body, while saying the words, ‘my body is good enough’, -to millions- of CBS Sunday Morning television viewers.  

All, in order to create a cultural context for people who choose to forego breast mound surgery.

In all of this, I have sometimes felt vulnerable beyond my ability to cope. Sometimes too, I was just as happy to thumb my nose at the assumption that breast mound surgeries were inevitable, for people in my situation. 

What I really learned during this time is, my actions, my art and my voice, -my words- are important! 

My passionately held ideals are now, thankfully, a shared and community endeavor. I have joined forces to create Flat Closure NOW, where we maintain a gallery of images of breast cancer patients around the world, with printables to bring to your doctor. I also join my voice to a cacophony of fellow advocates, who seek to change the narrative of what it can mean to have breast cancer and choose… aesthetic flat closure.

Just this month, the National Cancer Institute adopted into its dictionary of cancer terminology, the words, ‘aesthetic flat closure’ and given it a clear definition. My choice, now has a name and a specific description of outcome, so that no person need face what I did ten years ago.

Prior to this experience, I did not fully comprehend that one person can, indeed, change the world. I did not understand fully, that using my voice and speaking my mind, could have profound impact beyond the scope of my own personal, earthly bubble. Neither did I understand the importance of visibility within breast cancer community and beyond.

And, along the way, I continued to make artworks that speak to my experience.

I encourage you to check out the Running Stitch podcast interview of me and my mask making endeavors. And then, check out my Etsy, where you will find snazzy masks, hand printed nudes, my latest book and more.