Reaching out to my community

My goodness, life is challenging. I lost my job last July. My Mom passed away in October. I have been looking for work throughout the last eight months, but I have not found much that dovetails my skill set, nor have many perspective jobs responded to my reach. Ouch. I do understand that many people are in this same position. My Man applied for a job he was highly qualified for, to find out he was competing against 60 other applicants.

Beside looking for work, I have been exploring my creativity through making Sprit Dolls for inner child work. I notice that my inner voice, the one that responds to my anxiety, and inner conflicts, that voice could be gentler, softer, gently curious and inviting. I find that when I hold my own doll, and talk to it as if it is my younger self, I ask what I might need or want, I am more able to listen, comfort and support. Somehow, holding my doll, feeling its embroidered and hand stitched body in my hands, it builds loving connection to self.

I have also been learning to care for houseplants. Plants are gentle, intrepid and self knowing souls, it’s easy to intrinsically know this. Place a stem in a glass of water and watch how quickly roots form, they are tenacious and willing, within hours a small bud of a root will appear. When I greet my plants each day, it is with wonder. I assess each plant, weigh the pot to see if it is heavy with water, I take in the look of the leaves. I see my Baby Tears leaning toward the sun. My Pink Polka Nerve plant has been spiking up like a teenager, it’s new pot gave it so much room to spread out! The voice I use with my plants is kind and encouraging, just as I would like to speak to myself.

It is through these rituals that I seek to repair my relationship with myself. This care and self love is coalescing and I feel some pride in the endeavor. For years, I pushed my inner child aside, I rushed them, I became impatient when I could not discern or distill my needs quickly. I have learned the value of going slow, listening and supporting myself. This is a return home.

I know I will find work soon, I will find a job that suits me and my skillset, I trust this. I am grateful that I can use my hands to create things. I am grateful that I can grown lovely, receptive plants. I am able to use skills, built over decades, to calm and sooth myself, to make space for a new sense of self, and this makes me glad, no matter if life feels quite so challenging. 

And now, I am going to reach. This week I am updating my Etsy shop. By the end of the week, the seven siblings of my Spirit Doll will be placed in my shop and I hope you might purchase them. In the meantime, I am updating my shop with hand printed, quite affordable, postcards. When you purchase a postcard, I will write you a message, place the card in the mail, and you will receive a lovely piece of original Melly art.